Battlefield
by yuuram2fangirl
Summary: Conyuu. One- shot. Yozak's thoughts on everything around him.


**Battlefield (Yozak P.O.V)**

**Disclaimer:**** My doctors have assured me that I do not own KKM!**

**Author notes:**** This is my first time writing a Conyuu fic. It about what Yozak thinks and how much he cares about Conrart. It isn't very long but hopefully it is good. I decided to try my hand at something different than Yuuram and I have no idea if I succeeded.**

_I would hold your heart  
In my hands  
Without tearing it apart  
I could feel your lungs  
With my fingertips  
And not crush them  
Underneath my weight  
I would carry your bones  
All 206  
And not love any of them  
But I don't have that power over you  
She does._

Death. A word that nobody liked to hear. It had an ominous ring to it. The scent of death hung in the air as I sat by the grave. Unable to leave it. The one thing that I thought was worth living for was gone. Then what was I doing here? I hoped that I would starve to death. But if anyone found me here, I would anyway be killed.

Like they killed my mother.

I never could, nor ever would, understand what her fault was. Love was a fickle thing. It was something that was impossible to explain in words. They say that love conquers everything. They were wrong. If love conquers everything why didn't it conquer death? If my mother lived life so much why was it taken away from her?

I sat there for days crying for what I had lost. Then one day, he came.

He and his father were passing through there when they spotted me. There they were, sitting regally on horses while I, dirty faced and tiny, sat near the grave with a tear stained face.

I never expected anything to move me from there. For anyone to care about me enough to take me away from there. All my life I had been hearing about how demons were cruel and evil. I had believed in it too. Hadn't my father abandoned my mother? True she was a prostitute and left me in a church but I knew she did it for my own good. If my father hadn't left would she still be alive? Would we be a happy family?

Imagine my surprise when he explained that his mother is the Demon Queen and they (he and his father) had come here for travelling. It was clear that he was a half-human half-demon. Like me.

If demons did hate humans than why did their Queen marry a human? If demons were all that bad weren't the ruler supposed to hate humans too?

Looking at his gentle and soft eyes I shrugged and decided to do the one thing I swore I would never do.

I trusted him.

Death had struck again. This time it wasn't anyone of my side but of his. The only thing one could say was that Dunheely had lived a remarkable life. Dunheely had died a normal death but it still hit him hard.

It hit me hard too. Though I would never admit it to anyone. He was one person I would always admire. But I couldn't break down that easily. He had slipped on a mask- a poker face- to hide his sadness. But being with him for so long, I was able to see through it clearly.

I never mentioned it to him but I just stood there, ready to support him silently. He accepted it. Silently. I was a shoulder to lean on and I knew he trusted me.

**X-X-X-X-X-X-X**

Chance meetings don't always turn out good. It depends on who you met and how you reacted.

It was like that I met his elder brother Gwendal von Voltaire. His transfer under the Wincotts had unsettled me as well as a lot of other soldiers in our division. He was one of the best swordsmen and to have him changed as a private instructor while we were on the brink of war was frustrating. I would've thought that his mother, Cecelia von spitzberg, might've had something to do with it if not for the fact that his uncle, Stoffel von spitzberg was like the majority of mazuko who hated half breeds and would've not minded sending his nephew to the frontlines.

It was a well known fact that the 26th Maoh had left all the responsibility of taking decisions on her advisor. Too bad she had awful tastes in advisors.

Cecelia von spitzberg was a carefree, flirty and easy-going as far as I've heard. But Gwendal von Voltaire was the complete opposite. He was a hard and rough man with a grim expression permanently etched to his face. But when I first set my eyes on him he was just a huge man who was hiding a kitten in his uniform as he ran from a certain infamous poison lady.

My visit to the castle was to meet Günter von Christ and have him sign the document that all the soldiers in the squad had signed on. To bring him back. We thought that getting the signature of Lord von Christ would make the document more effective.

But I changed my tactics. After helping Lord von Voltaire to hide from Lady Anissina A.K.A Poison Lady- how someone so small could be so destructive I have no idea- I decided to take his sign too.

To my surprise he bluntly declined. My first thought was that he wanted to protect his brother. They might be half brothers but family was family. And family wasn't always blood. According to me, its people in our life who care about us; the ones who accept us for who we are. The one who could do anything for our happiness and who would love us no matter what. That was what family really meant. And I couldn't really agree that what he was doing was wrong.

But I soon learnt that Lord von Voltaire was keeping him as a trump card. Lord von Voltaire also assured me that within 2 years the army would be under his command and he would transfer him back. Until then I could work under him.

How did I know he was telling the truth? I didn't. But I still trusted him.

That was one chance meeting that went right after all.

**X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X**

Red. The colour of death. It was also the colour of blood. Blood that was spilled around the battlefield. This war was one of the worst that had ever been fought. And I had the honor of being a part of it. Yes, I am being extremely sarcastic.

Death had been a constant part of my life. I lived with it during the day and dreamt about it during the night. But the death occurring here reminded me of my mother's death. Unnecessary and a waste. People killing each other without mercy just to show that they loved their country more than themselves. What foolishness!

I could see him fighting bravely a little distance away from me. But I couldn't let myself get distracted. I never imagined that he would be sent to the front lines. Stoffel von spitzberg had more influence than I had previously thought.

So I fought. I fought for my country. I fought for Shin Makuko.

I fought for him.

**X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X**

At the end, the field was covered with dead bodies. But when I looked up and saw him leaning on his sword I knew that it was worth it if he was safe.

Call me selfish and hard-hearted but I am not going to deny that I cared about him more than anyone else. It would've been fine if he had survived while I died. I carried him on my shoulder all the way to camp. He was even more injured than me.

But I knew he would be fine. He had to be.

Death had struck yet again. This time I cared, not because I knew the person who died but because he cared about her. Suzanna Julia. He might never admit it but I know he cared deeply about her. More deeply than anyone realized.

I knew it the moment I saw the expression on his face at the mention of her death. The blue stone clutched in his hand as an anguished expression overtook his normally gentle features. He was in his personal hell.

Next day, I went to meet him. I was completely wrapped in bandages but at least I could walk. He was still clutching the blue stone when I entered. It made my heart twist painfully as I saw the hopeless expression on his face. But there was no way I was going to allow him to give up.

After remarking that I didn't save him from there just to let him waste his life and that there would be people who would be sad if he died, I left. I hoped that he would take these words to heart and try to forget her. Though, deep in my heart, I knew that he never would. But I hoped that time would heal his wounds like it healed mine. Though time wasn't the only thing that helped me forget my past. He was the main reason. Not that I would ever tell him.

**X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X**

Cross- dressing was always fun. Donning on a disguise and forgetting who we are for some time. Who could resist it? Certainly not me. That was when I met out new Demon King.

He was cute. I had to admit it. But is he capable? I didn't think so. He was too easy-going and trusting. He could be easily manipulated. But the look on his face when he is with the Maoh was something I hadn't seen for a long time. So I kept quiet.

I mentally prepared myself for another bloody war. Yuuri shibuya was powerful. His magic, outstanding. Who else I knew could summon their maryuko in human territory and that too with such disgusting and fascinating magic?

After the Morgif fiasco, he reprimanded me. I knew he cared for the boy but this was too much. I was just testing the boy to see what he is capable of. No one wanted a weak king. And no matter how he is I will continue to support him.

That was all I could do.

But my view of our Maoh changed when he entrusted me with the small black stone from the demon sword. He knew I could've sold it to anyone or do whatever I wanted with it.

The trust he had in me was what touched me.

I started trusting him too.

**X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X**

It was a new beginning. As peace reigned in the kingdom and the world settle down I continued my work as a spy. II continued to believe in our king who has done something that no other Maoh's could do. Unite the world.

Maybe big Shimaron was still not our ally, but most of the other human countries are. Smiles could be seen all around as people relaxed; enjoying after a long time.

Love is of many types. But cruelest of them is one sided love. Most love stories are about people who fall in love with each other. But what about others? What about the rest of us? The ones who are cursed to only love but not to be loved.

He was starting to heal. Slowly but surely. I don't know if the day will come when he'll see me as more than just a friend. And I know that I will always be by his side.

For my heart was, and always will be, his.

Even if he doesn't know it.

**Author Notes: Most of the parts are taken from the novels. Especially meeting Gwendal. It was one of the short stories or something. I just decided to add it here. You can read it if you want. It had been translated into English. Anyways review!**


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